This article is really focused on getting rid of the excuses. Itís time for some tough love, to take stock of your life, figure out what exactly it is that you want, ascertain if you are willing to work hard for it, get on the path, rinse, wash, repeat and keep going until you achieve it or you die first. Sorry, no ifs ands or buts accepted this time around!
Hereís the deal, life is really simple. No, really, it is. Now, for the sake of this article letís assume we can take out extraneous situations from the fringes such as if you were born with horrible disfigurations or are extremely wealthy already, etc. If that does describe you and youíre still reading www.TrainEatLive.com, then we commend you and just by showing the effort and determination to read about health, training, nutrition and wellness we know you are on the right path.
For the rest of you that have no excuses, no horrible debilitating diseases nor family riches, letís see where your problems lie. Look, weíve all heard the rags-to-riches stories of famous athletes, entertainers and business people. These people have overcome tragedy, travesty, poverty, abuse (physical/mental/emotional/sexual) and basically the worst set of odds anyone would ever have in their lives and traded it for success. How they did it, well, that is the million dollar question now isnít it? Guts, grit, hard-work, determination, being able to look forward, luck, some of the above, all of the above? They just did it. They used all that but most of all they just did it every day. They woke up, and kept pushing to get where they wanted to be at, and they did it again the next day and next day and so on. Once they hit their goals they kept pushing further and further. Not once per week or once per month, but every day. Why? They couldnít live any other way other than to create their own destiny. Remember - stagnation is a bad place to be in.
Letís be honest Ė what are the things you have wanted for yourself that you havenít achieved yet? What are the dreams that you do not even TRY to work towards? How many people do you know in your life (I would venture to say most all of them?) that are in the same boat? Not happy with who they are or what situations they are in, but yet, not moving to change that very quickly either. Letís talk specifics, and trust me when I say nothing is out of the question. What could you possibly want that you think is impossible? For I assure you, everything does have a path to it. Some paths are harder to attain, some take longer but in the end, they are all attainable.
I Want to be a Famous Athlete - What it takes: Yes, some good genes help but beyond that years (not months) of consistent, painful training and nutrition, sacrifice of time spent with friends/family, positive mindset, flexibility to move to wherever is required to play (from small towns in Iowa to playing basketball in Europe), patience to learn from your teammates and coaches. I Want to be a Famous Actor - What it takes: Same as above with maybe a little less focus on nutrition/training but more tolerance for rejection akin to cold-calling, playing the ĎHollywoodí game which is basically selling your soul and doing what is best for your career at a momentís notice, being surrounded continuously in an industry which isnít kind or concerned about your feelings but rather has all sorts of dysfunctional people abound and in general is more concerned about market share and positioning, like most industries. Perseverance beyond what you can imagine. The person who moves to LA and gives it a go for five years before slinking back home to mediocrity could have been 3 months removed from a life-changing audition.
I Want to be a Famous Musician -
What it takes: Re-read above and just add in intense amounts of musical training. Everyoneís a musician. Rarely any are good. Rarely any from that even smaller group will ever amount to anything commercially. Can you tour in small, no-name bars and clubs regionally for $40/night in pay for your share of the bandís take with 10 people half-listening to you in the audience? Can you repeat for 3 years to build a following? How tolerant are you to Ramen noodles and Mac n Cheese as your food staples? Unlike athletes or actors in most situations, now you must also be basically married to band-mates and add that friction to the implosive nature.
I Want to Run a Successful Business -
What it takes: Talk about perseverance! Great ideas, patience, business management skills, ability to raise money (should be an article on its own!), be self-motivated (MUCH harder than it sounds), well read, great instincts (which can be developed over time but now weíre talking a harder goal all comprised), timing, ability to play the Ďcorporate politicsí game and not get burnt out on the typical evils of business.
I Want to Marry a Famous Model/Actor -
What it takes:
1. Become who they would want to be with.
2. Get inside their world.
When Jennifer Aniston first went out with Brad Pitt, rumor has it that she researched all the things he was into so that he would like her more. Effort and investment people. How do you become who they would want to be with? First, make yourself into the best you person you would want to be! Become emotionally stable (even though you may not want to be with them once you achieve this, but we digress), get in the shape you want to be in/someone famous would want to be with, become well-read in general along with the stuff they are interested in (no matter how kooky). A lot of work, but the harder part now is getting inside their world. Move to where they live. Work at places they frequent (hot clubs, restaurants Ė hey itís happened before), cater for them, get on movie sets in higher level production careers, work at talent agencies and move your way up. Work with their managers and lawyers. This will take years to accomplish but when you do, your life will be forever changed. We canít wait to see you in the tabloids!
I Just Want to Find True Love -
What it takes: Take everything you know from movies or the general media and throw it away. Invest. Devote. Open up. Stop settling. Read about true chemistry. Do a lot of the stuff above in making yourself the person you want to be first. Love yourself truly. Itís simple but I guarantee most will not be able to do it.
Meet people like crazy. Be picky. Learn. Repeat. Do not settle.
I Want to be President -
What it takes: Look, history has been made with our first African-American president (albeit half), and there will one day likely be a female president, an atheist president and even a gay president. What is stopping you? Do a lot of the above steps to better yourself, go into local politics, READ and get educated, get a law degree (as many Presidents/Congress members have had), become accomplished, run for offices and repeat. Do your job well, learn how to campaign better and repeat.
Why You Are Likely Not on the Path to Any of These Things
Pick some of the following. Pick them all. Weíre not trying to be mean Ė just honest. If you had already achieved your dreams you probably wouldnít have gotten this far.
You enjoy relaxing too much, either by yourself or with friends, family and romantic partners. You have hobbies that take up a lot of your time. You have entitlement issues and turn people off. You donít mind working hard for a week, a month or even a year Ė but donít think that you should have to work hard for decades to achieve your dreams. You like material things and would rather work at a Ďgoodí mid-level job to afford your lifestyle than to Ďrough ití and go without your lattes and vacations and nice car while you work in lesser-paid but flexible environments as you really focus on achieving the dreams above. You think going to the gym 4-6 times a week is cruel and it hurts and people should like Ďrealí (read- average) bodies instead of those that have obviously taken a lot of work to attain. You donít have the discipline to sit and practice music for 4 hours a day every day. You think healthy eating is boring and you just canít give up smoking and drinking even though youíve tried. You donít want to change your life, reboot it even with new people within who push you and challenge you and make you a better you , because you enjoy the company your friends provide you much of the time and even though itís not fulfilling itís simple and youíre in control of it. You canít handle rejection. You canít handle being alone, especially for months or years at a time. You canít live with roommates to lessen your living expenses while you fight to achieve your dreams. You are not at peace with yourself. You donít even know yourself. You complain with every daylight savings change, instead of dealing with it. You donít know how to prioritize or sacrifice the right way. I could go on, but you get the point.
Now itís not that youíre a bad person per se, itís just that youíre not displaying the ruthless, Ďmercenaryí-type dedication and devotion it takes to be a true winner in this world when you join the elite less-than-1%, letís say for the sake of example. Weíre not talking about just financially elite, but overall quality-of-life, Ďhave achieved my dreams and I havenít settled for a decent or good life but designed THE most amazing life that I could have wanted and I finally have it and am so happy I didí type of elite.
ĎOk, ok, V. Thompson, whoever you are thatís making me feel bad right now, tell me what to do to make it better alreadyí!
I thought you would never ask. Hereís your simple play-by-play.
1 - Clean up your life. Yes, before you even think hard about what you want to do to achieve your dreams, fix the stuff you KNOW is broken. Everything from the cabinet handle that bothers you every day to the friends/relationships you know are damaging to you and holding you back. Doing this will help you clear your head and motivate you toÖ.
2- Discover yourself. With your newfound freedom go explore the things you never could find anyone to explore with you. Bored with the gym? Try martial arts or rock climbing. Bored with bars? Go to museums and gallery openings. Pick a town thatís a two-hour drive away. Go there Saturday morning with no itinerary and find something to do for the next 24 hours before you come back. Relax.
3 Ė Write down where you are in each of the main pillars in your life along with where you want to be:
Physically (health-wise, image-wise, the full package)
Socially (friends, romantic relationships)
Professionally (job vs. career, dreams)
Home-Life (sanctuary or hellish?)
Inner Peace (demons vanquished or still roaming?)
4 - Work your you-know-what off in order to achieve these things for the rest of your life! It will not be easy, and you will have many detractors on the way. DO NOT GIVE IN! Remember, try and try again, fail on the way, learn on the way and eventually succeed. The thought of the alternative, doing nothing, just makes me want to shiver.
If we didnít believe in you and didnít want to see you achieve your dreams, we wouldnít be writing this article. Do it for yourself. Do it for us. Do it for others. Do something.
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